Define Your Own Rules for Life, Or Someone Else Will

Most men never stop to define their own rules for life. 

Instead, they inherit beliefs from parents, teachers, culture, and circumstance—never questioning whether those beliefs serve them or keep them stuck.

They operate on default settings, wondering why they feel lost, directionless, or stuck in patterns that never lead to progress. They chalk it up to bad luck, fate, or external circumstances, when in reality, they are being guided by an invisible script they never chose.

Belief: The Subconscious Driver of Action

Every action you take [or fail to take] is rooted in belief, whether you’re aware of it or not.

A belief is a deeply held assumption about reality, shaped by experience, repetition, and influence.

It determines how you think, what you do, and ultimately, what you achieve.

• If you believe money is hard to make, you’ll subconsciously resist wealth-building opportunities.

• If you believe all relationships eventually fail, you’ll sabotage intimacy.

• If you believe discipline is suffering, you’ll never sustain growth.

Most beliefs operate at a subconscious level, shaping your life without you realizing it. Until you bring them to the surface, they will continue to dictate your results, and you will call it “fate.”

How We Challenge and Develop New Beliefs

Beliefs are not static. They are either reinforced or redefined through experience.

We challenge and develop new beliefs by using accurate mental models, structured ways of thinking that help us approach challenges and difficulties with clarity, rather than emotion or avoidance.

This process is built on three core elements:

1. Process – The structured steps we take to navigate difficulty.

2. Principles – The guiding truths that keep us aligned despite uncertainty.

3. Decision (Action & Feedback) – The cycle of applying new behaviors, observing results, and refining our approach.

A new belief is not truly ours until we have experiential proof, something tangible that shows us the new way works better than the old one.

The shift from theory to transformation happens when:

• We place greater value on the new path than on staying the same.

• We see results, no matter how small, reinforcing the new perspective.

• We repeat the process until the new belief becomes confidence.

This is how we evolve: Not by blindly accepting new ideas, but by testing, experiencing, and proving them to ourselves.

A Personal Philosophy is a Framework

It encompasses your core beliefs, values and experiences into an iterative system of thought.

It is an ever evolving structure that ultimately guides your life.

• Decisions – What you say yes or no to.

• Discipline – What standards you hold yourself to.

• Direction – The path you take and why.

Without defining these, you become reactive instead of intentional, following external influences rather than leading your own path.

Your personal philosophy is ultimately your Legacy, whether its written or unconscious it will be the memory you leave others with.

 How to Create Your Personal Philosophy

1. Define Your Core Beliefs – What are the unshakable truths you live by? Question the ones you inherited.

• why do I believe this to be true?

2. Clarify Your Values – What do you prioritize above all else?

• what would I need to value for my vision to become automatic?

3. Define your Experience – What experiences shaped your mindset?

• what experience can you create that will confirm your beliefs?

4. Develop Your Principles – What rules govern your decisions and actions?

• what are your non-negotiables, guidelines and moral compass?

5. Refine and Apply – A philosophy is useless if it isn’t lived.

• how can I take action on this now?

Why This Matters

Without a personal philosophy, you will be shaped by the loudest voices in the room, social media, weak men, and fear-driven culture.

Or continue to run a broken script passed down by parents, teachers or society.

But when you define your own rules, you move through life with clarity, confidence, and control… and that changes everything.

You can either design your operating system or live by someone else’s.

What’s your personal philosophy on life?

Talk soon,

E