6 minute read

Discipline 101: How to master it.

• why we struggle with discipline

• discipline without vision is punishment

• start here to build discipline

I like most men have struggle with discipline. [scroll for proof]

I have been through many season where I just didn’t feel like doing the things I know I should.

I let myself get fat 215 pounds at nearly 40% bodyfat.

Eating garbage, drinking and smoking pot — knowing I should make different choices but having little self control and making choices based on how I felt.

I’ve spent myself into debt, racking up credit cards, over leveraging, living paycheck to paycheck and not saving for my future all because I wanted what I wanted now rather than waiting for it.

I’ve lost my temper, said things I couldn’t take back, gotten into fights and ruined relationships because I acted immaturely and didn’t exercise emotional discipline.

I’ve missed out on opportunities, broken trust and caused people to doubt my ability because I lacked followthrough, starting things but not finishing them.

All of this a symptom of poor discipline.

I’d find myself in the aftermath of whatever mess I created frustrated, angry and confused trapped in a victim mindset not knowing why I was “in this again”.

Repeating the same pathetic pattern over and over again watching it get worse.

A life without discipline is a life in prison.

I tried to just work harder, white knuckle it and force my way through an outcome.

It worked for brief periods, I’d have some wins, meet an immediate goal and then find myself backsliding feeling unable to keep up the momentum.

Short bursts of intensity rather than methodical consistency.

To make matters worse I’d myself in self-deprecating spirals saying fuck it and sedating with more impulsive decisions that reaffirmed my lack of discipline.

I was imprisoned in my own decisions slowly suffocating and wasting my life away.

This went on for years until I made a profound discovery.

I’ve read this scripture 100 times.

When I first read it my interpretation was that without a clear vision people die, and while that’s often true the translation of this piece of wisdom is much deeper and far more profound.

The NIV translation says this:

“Where there is no revelation, people cast off restraint; but blessed is the one who heeds wisdom’s instruction.”

Where there is no revelation [no compelling vision] People cast off restraint [become undisciplined].

But blessed is the one who heeds wisdom’s instruction.

This was a revelation for me.

Human behavior is to avoid punishment and pursue pleasure.

This is fundamentally how we are wired.

We avoid doing things that cause us pain and pursue things that provide us pleasure, it is part of our evolutionary biology and I believe it’s is the leverage we need to create unbreakable discipline.

If you’re anything like me and have already tried to white knuckle your way through doing what you should you’ve probably also experienced the same frustrating let down when you can’t sustain the effort.

You don’t need more discipline — you need more vision.

Vision is the fuel for discipline.

Vision leverages the pain and pleasure hardwiring rather than fighting against it.

Think about the last hard thing you successfully completed.

• a marathon

• graduating school

• starting a business

You had to exercise discipline to get the job done, there were likely countless moments you wanted to throw in the towel but something kept you going.

There were likely many sacrifices you had to make — waking up early, not going out or training when it was cold out — you did these things not only because of discipline but because there was a clear and compelling end in mind.

You knew the sacrifice and pain had meaning and wasn’t just fruitless punishment… there was a carrot of pleasure when you completed the task.

… and how good did it feel when you got the job done?

I’ll bet that was one of your proudest moments.

Vision fuels discipline.

Discipline without vision is just punishment.

Without Vision you’ll struggle with Discipline

A man needs a vision for his life.

For his fitness, family, finances and faith.

He needs an image in mind for a future self that stretches him beyond his current state.

It has to be clear, compelling and powerful enough to make discipline easy and automatic.

It may feel like a stretch to imagine your life different than it is now — but I promise you it is the most powerful thing you can do to create lasting change.

In 2014 I created my first vision.

I was fat, broke, drinking, drugging and distracting myself with anything and everything.

I hated what I saw in the mirror, who I had become and could feel my confidence deteriorate.

All I knew was I didn’t want what I had — but I couldn’t articulate exactly what I wanted… so I thought that was a good place to start.

I grabbed a sharpie marker and started writing.

16 pages [front and back after switching to a pen] later I looked down at my dream life.

It seemed impossible and so far away from where I was and at the same time possible.

When I read it, I couldn’t believe what I wrote, it moved moved me and was inspired from a far greater version of who I was.

It was the smallest piece of hope I needed to start making change.

Over the last 10 years this 16 page compass has helped direct my decisions and remind me that life is what we create, what we see and what we pursue.

The specific details have surprised me as they come to life and many elements I never would have anticipated have realized but the overall theme is my life.

With clarity of vision the discipline has become easier — I know where I’m going and what it looks when I get there.

There is reason for the sacrifice, meaning to the struggle and a compelling why driving the effort.

Vision precedes discipline.

Check out my previous article on Creating a Compelling Vision, included in it is a free training along with 15 questions to help you craft a discipline fueling vision.

====> How to create a Vivid Vision

Much love and many blessings,

E